Middleway

Youngsters think the parents are driving their life, driving them nuts. Parents think the kids don't want to listen to them, driving them nuts. As the kid in my family, I have seen and noticed both views. The seniors in my family tend to steer my life to what they think is good, meanwhile I am seeing that is not where I plan to go and I would steer my life away to where I want it to be. It's really tiring sometimes. I would say to my family, it's like I'm living, but I don't live my life. 

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Just like any problems out there, there ought to be a solution for this. I'm sure many of you are facing the same problem whether you are the parents or the kids. No one says parents are always right, most of the time parents learn from their personal experience and their personal experience is not necessarily same with ours, it just fit better in their time, situation, and goal. Kids' opinion isn't always right either, we tend to judge based on what we want and like, not necessarily thinking the future impact of our decisions. 



I say, it's all about understanding. Meet in the middleway. Kids need to understand parents and parents need to understand kids. Parent's are not life controller, parents are mentor and life guide. By that I mean, parent suggest and advise instead of dictating and controlling. 


Growing up and understanding Asian culture, I know many of us are steered to have a promising career like doctor, engineers, programmer. Many kids follow what their parents want them to be, mostly careers that make a lot of money. Not many kids think deep down in their hear and ask, what career makes them feel good and happy. I think the society has gotten better where parents ask grant freedom to their kids to pick what they want to learn and would like to be, this is how it should be guiding instead of dictating while kids should decide and consider the guidance from their parents. 


A couple of months ago, I had an argument with dad. Luckily we had family members that helped as reconcile. We said it was a problem where I don't understand why my parents are worried, and my dad doesn't understand millenials' life. We decided that we should be more considerate of others' needs and situation. Through the conflict, I as the kid learned that sometimes parents don't intend to control you, they want to guide you because they are worried - but maybe the way it gets communicated is not the way we perceive as a guide. Meanwhile, my dad learned that millenials these days want to have control over their life and dislike being 'told' to things. The relationship require understanding, and it's more a mentorship rather than dictatorship. I'm not saying any of the side is right or wrong, when there is an issue it really misunderstanding between both sides. 



So be a good kid, steer your life but listen and consider guidance from your life mentor, your parents. And be a good parent, be a mentor for your kids and guide them to the right way according to their situation and choice. Understand, and meet in the middleway. 


Love,

Catherine

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21 comments:




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